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#1 Carolyn

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Posted 28 August 2008 - 01:33 PM

Dear all,

'nuf is right. Death is one thing and how we celebrate another.

How would you celebrate a life or how have you done so in the past?

Faith sister,

Carolyn
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#2 nameless until fused

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Posted 28 August 2008 - 02:58 PM

Thanks, Carolyn, for starting this new thread.

I have a suspicion we might be waiting around for a heart-felt conversation on this topic until such a time when someone has need to deal with a death in their personal family/friend circle....

Part of me is feeling a bit guilty about the mirth I have whenever I see the name of the original thread - "Death".

Talk about a show-stopper ;)

Politics and religion aren't taboo subjects anymore in polite company - but "death" sure still is...

Talking "funerals" is one way we can still approach the topic. Even if someone believes that they are burying a "walking dead", custom can restrain much error in judgement when it comes to something that awaits us all and how we met it (ie - "they died with their boots on") ...hence the untapped "spiritual power" in how we evolve our funeral/fusion customs.

#3 Bill Martin

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Posted 28 August 2008 - 03:50 PM

Hey You All,

I have been nursing my dying Mother (she has brain cancer) back to health for almost three months. Thought she was gonna die about 5 weeks back, even put a baby monitor in her room so i wouldn't miss it.

We have to stop this tippy toeing around both the subject of Death and people who are dying. We who have been given the sequence of events in personality translation should possess the demeanor to maintain a reassuring calmness to help those dying maintain their focus on eternity, when the time comes. What a privelege to assist in the translation! What a service oppotunity!

One of the most effective tools i have employed to stimulate my Mother back from the brink of death is my fabulous cooking, what she wants, i cook, no matter what it is. The other is to challenge her by disagreeing with her just as i would if she was in her best health. Agitating her helped her recover. Maybe it's mean, but it worked.

When she feels sorry for herself, my request is for her to "show a little courage, to make God proud of her." Death is very real to those dying. Spectators may feel a sense of removal or distance but to add meaning and comfort to the experience is way more important than a memorial service, although they have their place to sooth the survivors.


It is good to talk about this as it is one of the taboo subjects we have had to avoid because there was no information about what lay beyond the portal. Now we know.


Bill Martin
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#4 Bill Urantia

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Posted 28 August 2008 - 05:22 PM

Friends,

In my family we cremate the deceased. Having long believed that death is only the beginning of life, we then have a little service (The Lord's Prayer, and the 23rd Psalm) then party. We have only lost our loved one for a brief period, and are confident that at some future date we will be reunited. It is an end to earthly suffering and the awakening to the organized and friendly universe.

The only sadness is for our personal disconnection until that time when we meet again. But when you remind yourself that your loved one has entered a better world, you recognize the selfishness of your feelings.

Bill,
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#5 Bill Martin

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Posted 28 August 2008 - 06:35 PM

Jesus Knew,

You can't get ahead of yourself in life. you have to "drink the full cup" of life (and not suck the sponge on the speartip).
Bill, your family seems to have a benign and loving approach to death in the family. The Vikings did it in a similar way. Light the bonfire with the loved one on top, say the words of fond farewell, get on with the party. We love you, see you soon.

Isn't it strange the way religious beliefs, such as the bodily resurrection of the dead at the "end of time," have led to laws of burial and embalming? You can't just light em up or plant them in their beloved garden. It must be done thusly...

Bill M
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#6 Guest_Rey Baskerville_*

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Posted 28 August 2008 - 07:35 PM

When my sister passed Dec. 07, I was relieved and satisfied she was no longer living the stroke-ridden, heart-failing, diabetic life we'd all grown accustomed to suffer. My family could not understand, and was even angry, that I was happy she was finally "free". I believed she HAD to be in a better place because my heart no longer hurt.

Her strokes left her immobile and the diabetes blinded her in the final years of her life, thus ever asking folks to read to her of her Lord. She'd been studying the UB for well over two decades and was, in my sorry opinion at the time, a Jesus freak.

Within weeks of her passing, I was strangely compelled to investigate this Urantia Book she was often spouting on about. Now a committed reader myself, my relief was eventually justified and the rest is history. I imagine I'll become a Jesus freak myself in about 40 papers ;)

See ya soon, sis!

At your service...

PS: Thanks Carolyn. Can you feel me smiling?

PPS: I had to stop doing my dishes to add this - she promised to flick me on the nose with her finger when I got there so I'd recognize her.

Edited by Rey Baskerville, 28 August 2008 - 07:50 PM.


#7 Carolyn

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Posted 29 August 2008 - 12:17 PM

Dear all,

Death and our relationship to it is often a matter of culture, tradition, and faith. I think that the way we celebrate or mourn is also these three.

The folks of the Pacific Ocean islands mourn with all their hearts, as do many other cultures. They weep and wail and carry on for weeks, months, and sometimes years. But when they stop they are happy and back to living. The puritanical Westererns, on the other hand, are stoic, sad, dress in black and mourn with grim faces and demeanor. Within those two opposite ways of mourning their are the variations about which we are talking now.

I have faith in what I know to be a certainty of a mortal's personality, whether my relative or friend, in what they want to happen with their mortal mechanism That is what should be done, even if we are offended by their choices. The distribution of their earthly possessions the same without fighting over the "spoils", so to speak. As to where their soul is headed upon death perhaps it is enough to leave it to the higher powers. If we start to think in time and space we might get involved with judgement without mercy; or too much mercy without judgement. IMO.

I am comfortable with knowing my dear parents are sleeping and waiting for the next despensation. They were/are valuable personalities, but they accepted in their lifetime only a small interest in the development of their souls. As my mother, with great courage, accepted her inevitable death from cancer, she planned everything about her funeral, possessions, and took great care in keeping those left behind in her plans. She spent no time preparing her soul except to repeat with me in the last moments, before she lost that ability to communicate, this statement: "I am a child of God." We repeated it three times with my mouth to her ear as she had me lie beside her on what would become her death bed. She let me know, by that simple act, that she knew that much for certain. She had lived a life of example of all values we strive to live, and yet in the last years of her life she professed that death leads only to darkness. My father began to loose his mind over several years time and so his smile at the end was all that was needed to let his mechanism go. He too had lived the values and loved a really good funeral with lots of celebrating afterwards. He attended a lot of them. ...I thought I could hear him laughing at his.

I have faith in where I want to go enough to strive for it and I think I have a fairly good idea about who I will meet there.


Faith sister,

Carolyn







When my sister passed Dec. 07, I was relieved and satisfied she was no longer living the stroke-ridden, heart-failing, diabetic life we'd all grown accustomed to suffer. My family could not understand, and was even angry, that I was happy she was finally "free". I believed she HAD to be in a better place because my heart no longer hurt.

Her strokes left her immobile and the diabetes blinded her in the final years of her life, thus ever asking folks to read to her of her Lord. She'd been studying the UB for well over two decades and was, in my sorry opinion at the time, a Jesus freak.

Within weeks of her passing, I was strangely compelled to investigate this Urantia Book she was often spouting on about. Now a committed reader myself, my relief was eventually justified and the rest is history. I imagine I'll become a Jesus freak myself in about 40 papers ;)

See ya soon, sis!

At your service...

PS: Thanks Carolyn. Can you feel me smiling?

PPS: I had to stop doing my dishes to add this - she promised to flick me on the nose with her finger when I got there so I'd recognize her.


"Knowledge is possessed only by sharing; it is safeguarded by wisdom and socialized by love."

#8 Guest_Rey Baskerville_*

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Posted 30 August 2008 - 10:14 AM

Carolyn and Bill,

I found so much value in the experiences you two have shared in this thread.

She spent no time preparing her soul except to repeat with me in the last moments, before she lost that ability to communicate, this statement: "I am a child of God." We repeated it three times with my mouth to her ear as she had me lie beside her on what would become her death bed.


One of the most effective tools i have employed to stimulate my Mother back from the brink of death is my fabulous cooking, what she wants, i cook, no matter what it is. The other is to challenge her by disagreeing with her just as i would if she was in her best health. Agitating her helped her recover. Maybe it's mean, but it worked.


I can't help but imagine this must be the work of angels in the flesh. Coffee and cake next time you're in L.A.?

At your service...

#9 Carolyn

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Posted 31 August 2008 - 12:55 PM

Dear Rey,

Thank you for the invitation.;)

Funerals: I think that we all might hold one of a personal nature to celebrate the passing of the "past." Moving forward is progression and for many we must share the past in order to do that and then once shared, and affirmed by good friends who love us, we sincerely can forget it ever happened. The Father has. He forgives us our errors and possible sins before we engage in them. That is what brings "the peace."

Then we do the inevitable; when we meet new friends we regurgetate the past one more time inspite of that assurance we know. Why do we do that?
It could such a lovely funeral.

Faith sister,

Carolyn





Carolyn and Bill,

I found so much value in the experiences you two have shared in this thread.

I can't help but imagine this must be the work of angels in the flesh. Coffee and cake next time you're in L.A.?

At your service...


"Knowledge is possessed only by sharing; it is safeguarded by wisdom and socialized by love."

#10 nameless until fused

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Posted 31 August 2008 - 03:41 PM

Okay - this is good....honing in on what a funeral could be about....

Guess the spiritual power a funeral can have is as a celebration of "love". Who would want any kind of love that they have ever experienced to be something left in the "past"? I don't even think that that is possible - to leave the only "thing" that a person can experience while in the flesh - love - that is made up of the same "stuff" that everything is made up of that is able to transcend time and space in the "past"...there is no "past" with "love"...and only a personality can love and be loved - so a funeral is about the personality who moved on - or should be - and not about how we put that person in the "past"....?

Or is the funeral about "us" and not about the personality no longer with "us"....?

Thanks, Carolyn, for giving me something to think about - part one of the funeral could be a remembrance about the deceased, and part two could be about the people who loved the person and are grieving at the temporary loss of their company, and maybe a part three for all those who would love to celebrate the personality being in the "past"? ;)

#11 Carolyn

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Posted 01 September 2008 - 11:25 AM

OK 'nuf. Thanks for gving me credit for something I didn't mean to imply, but it turns out you took the implication and came up with a plan for a good funeral.

I had been reading, not only my own writing of late, but those of others which magnified the tragedies of our past experiences, (ie. a childhood of pain and suffering or an adult experience that was filled with hatred for a personality) and thinking that a ceremony to rid us of the animal need for repetition or regurgitation of such sadness. So this was totally not about death of a personality but the proposed death of experiences that are no longer a reality. I just wanted for us to find away to move on from the pain of the "past?"

Thanks, Carolyn, for giving me something to think about - part one of the funeral could be a remembrance about the deceased, and part two could be about the people who loved the person and are grieving at the temporary loss of their company, and maybe a part three for all those who would love to celebrate the personality being in the "past"? ;)


Attending funerals to celebrate all three parts, about which you write above, seem (IMO) to be more likely to heal the pain of the loss of someone we love.
We can know all the facts about death, the steps to recovery from the sorrow, and even have faith in the spiritual lessons, but as humans, "death" still must be more than a comfort of faith and knowledge of the facts. It must heal our souls on an even higher level as mortals who mourn the permanent (on earth) loss. I have never been to a just-the-Church-ritual-ceremony funeral that filled the hole. But I have been to simple celebrations, without pomp and circumstances, that did.

I really think the funerals of the planets settled father towards "light and Life" get my attention. p. 623 "...And what a beautiful occasion when mortals thus forgather to witness the ascension of their loved ones in spiritual flames, and what a contrast to those earlier ages when mortals must commit their dead to the embrace of the terrestial elements! The scenes of weeping and wailing characteristic of earlier epochs of human evolution are now replaced by ecstatic joy and the sublimest enthusiasm as these God-knowing mortals bid their loved ones a transient farewell as they are removed from the material associations by the spiritual fires of consuming grandeur and ascending glory."

These funerals (likened to graduations) give the remaining "progressive" mortals faith, hope, and assurance. If our funerals do that, have we succeeded in possibly healing the souls in mourning?

Faith sister,

Carolyn
"Knowledge is possessed only by sharing; it is safeguarded by wisdom and socialized by love."

#12 Bill Martin

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Posted 01 September 2008 - 12:01 PM

Dear Carolyn,

I see us working toward a type of celebration of life that can be a ministry to souls and a revelation of higher truth than "ashes to ashes, dust to dust-you been here too long with us." i love my Mom, but don't know if i'll be up to spiritualizing the attendees at her memorial service. Guess i better get working on it now, cause later will be too late.

Bill
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#13 nameless until fused

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Posted 01 September 2008 - 12:35 PM

[quote name='Carolyn' date='Sep 1 2008, 09:25 AM' post='5094']
OK 'nuf. Thanks for gving me credit for something I didn't mean to imply, but it turns out you took the implication and came up with a plan for a good funeral.

All things work for the good - when the intention to do good is there...I was doing my free-thinking again and that process is not meant to accuse anyone of implying something....


I had been reading, not only my own writing of late, but those of others which magnified the tragedies of our past experiences, (ie. a childhood of pain and suffering or an adult experience that was filled with hatred for a personality) and thinking that a ceremony to rid us of the animal need for repetition or regurgitation of such sadness.


People concoct their own ceremonies at will and that's maybe the problem ;) I'm thinking about the State Ranger in Arizona, a couple of years back, who decided to burn photos of her ex (while she was on the job! sigh). She nearly burnt down all of Arizona with her ceremony. At least she was a brave soul and told the truth so we all learned from her mistake - what a whopper of a mistake, though, huh? Fires burned for months - property damage, firefighters injured, etc.

So this was totally not about death of a personality but the proposed death of experiences that are no longer a reality. I just wanted for us to find away to move on from the pain of the "past?"

Okay. Yet another good, separate topic....

Attending funerals to celebrate all three parts, about which you write above, seem (IMO) to be more likely to heal the pain of the loss of someone we love.
We can know all the facts about death, the steps to recovery from the sorrow, and even have faith in the spiritual lessons, but as humans, "death" still must be more than a comfort of faith and knowledge of the facts. It must heal our souls on an even higher level as mortals who mourn the permanent (on earth) loss. I have never been to a just-the-Church-ritual-ceremony funeral that filled the hole. But I have been to simple celebrations, without pomp and circumstances, that did.

I like the line from an "Enigma" (musical group) CD - "....dying is teaching us how to live..."


I really think the funerals of the planets settled father towards "light and Life" get my attention. p. 623 "...And what a beautiful occasion when mortals thus forgather to witness the ascension of their loved ones in spiritual flames, and what a contrast to those earlier ages when mortals must commit their dead to the embrace of the terrestial elements! The scenes of weeping and wailing characteristic of earlier epochs of human evolution are now replaced by ecstatic joy and the sublimest enthusiasm as these God-knowing mortals bid their loved ones a transient farewell as they are removed from the material associations by the spiritual fires of consuming grandeur and ascending glory."

I could NOT find this in the UB - thanks for providing the actual quote that I was thinking about when I went down this road pondering your conversation starter back in the "Death" thread - how much info is too much info...and is there too much info in the UB about what happens after we leave Urantia?

These funerals (likened to graduations) give the remaining "progressive" mortals faith, hope, and assurance. If our funerals do that, have we succeeded in possibly healing the souls in mourning?

It's going on two years, and the grieving Mother who lost her exquisite daughter (and my "godchild") to neuroblastoma at Age 12 continues to grieve deeply and, still at times, without consolation. I finally figured out that on top of her grief, there was that layer of parental concern for the well-being of her daughter - a parent never stops worrying about the child...once I keyed into that undercurrent of her grief, I was able to help console her (and myself) a little....the Mother is also being consoled when she realizes that none of us who knew her daughter will forget her, just like the Mother will never forget her. Saying goodbye to a parent/grandparent who has lived well into their paltinum years ;) is a whole different goodbye, no? And the longer you live, the more "enemies" you might make :P But it IS much easier and more "natural" to say goodbye to the old. It's certainly more of a "graduation" like the ceremony on page 623. The loss that keeps on giving, so to speak, is the sudden loss of a person in their prime of life. We, more or less, have to constantly readjust to that kind of a loss because the "prime of life" refers to the contribution that the mature adult was making when they died "with their boots on" - a great phrase, btw...we all seem to understand that bottom-lining of the situation. There is more joy in keeping the "love" light burning than there is in selfishly "missing" the "love" the departed one lavished on us while they were alive...

Bottom line - we all will have to deal with the death of a loved one AND putting to rest something in the past through the thorough and complete understanding of it - which I don't think happens here on Urantia - the "past" sometimes resembles an onion with its many layers - so the complete understanding of it can take a lifetime...and longer...as it says in the UB, there are no short cuts. So no burning of photos on a high desert mesa in Arizona! ;)


#14 Carolyn

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Posted 02 September 2008 - 12:35 PM

'nuf,

Funerals and deaths are increasing with age. The more I attend and experience the more there are to attend and experience. Interesting to be beyond the "prime of life" as one gets some perpective on those mortals who age and die gracefully and those who depart kicking.

The count of departed "prime of life" close family or friends is more than enough and yet there will be more. As I ponder as to which "death" was the most tragic, I would have to say two; our gorgeous, talented 20 year old daughter, suddenly killed, and our beautiful stillborn granddaughter who suddenly died, for no reason. As to the "death" of dear close friends, I consider those to be the ones most difficult to let go; comrades who know you best like you know them. Most recent in April was a younger first cousin I knew as a sister. We had a lifetime of mutual memories.

Which of their funerals was the most comforting? I think it was all of those I was unable to attend. Funerals are more likely to induce more sorrow than resolve. (IMO) The old idea that they give you "closure" is a myth perpetuated by those who stand to profit from grief. Some of that profit is not monetary. Some is recognition for "look at me, my mourning is better/bigger" or "look at me...I am in charge of this event of mourning."

How do we mourn? Absolutely, alone. That may be why all that information in UB is valuable to some and not to others. It is the individual's experience and journey. I agree with 'nuf's CD quote: death and funerals are teaching tools.

The most profound lessons are to be learned from the death of Jesus of Nazareth. No closer death than that of our Brother's, killed in the "prime of [earth] life." We neither mourn nor miss him, but we do love him for his life lived and his death given with love.


Faith sister,

Carolyn



[. The loss that keeps on giving, so to speak, is the sudden loss of a person in their prime of life. We, more or less, have to constantly readjust to that kind of a loss because the "prime of life" refers to the contribution that the mature adult was making when they died "with their boots on" - a great phrase, btw...we all seem to understand that bottom-lining of the situation. There is more joy in keeping the "love" light burning than there is in selfishly "missing" the "love" the departed one lavished on us while they were alive...

Bottom line - we all will have to deal with the death of a loved one AND putting to rest something in the past through the thorough and complete understanding of it - which I don't think happens here on Urantia - the "past" sometimes resembles an onion with its many layers - so the complete understanding of it can take a lifetime...and longer...as it says in the UB, there are no short cuts. So no burning of photos on a high desert mesa in Arizona! ;) [/color]


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#15 nameless until fused

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Posted 02 September 2008 - 01:35 PM

'nuf,

Which of their funerals was the most comforting? I think it was all of those I was unable to attend. Funerals are more likely to induce more sorrow than resolve. (IMO) The old idea that they give you "closure" is a myth perpetuated by those who stand to profit from grief. Some of that profit is not monetary. Some is recognition for "look at me, my mourning is better/bigger" or "look at me...I am in charge of this event of mourning."

How do we mourn? Absolutely, alone. That may be why all that information in UB is valuable to some and not to others. It is the individual's experience and journey. I agree with 'nuf's CD quote: death and funerals are teaching tools.

The most profound lessons are to be learned from the death of Jesus of Nazareth. No closer death than that of our Brother's, killed in the "prime of [earth] life." We neither mourn nor miss him, but we do love him for his life lived and his death given with love.


Faith sister,

Carolyn


Yes, losing a child is the worst - I think people with wisdom will agree. The info in the UB should be a real comfort - you know she's MORE than okay and probably even more worried about you still being here on Urantia... ;)

I'm not sure it was all about the money that funeral homes make when we look back on the pyramids in Egypt....? Do you...? True, "misery loves company", but I still like the idea of a "graduation" celebration and proper science applied to burying a dead body....it sure beats digging a big hole in the garden and chucking in the body while no one is around - although any kind of "celebration" will certainly cost more money than that. ;)

That's the problem with "traditional" interpretations of Jesus's "death", we don't even realize that he's still alive. As is your daugther and your dear life-long friend and all the others we might be missing. Agreed - only when you still feel the "love" do you know that truth...

#16 Carolyn

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Posted 02 September 2008 - 02:13 PM

'nuf,

What do think of when the memories of the departed come winging back at those odd moments in time?

I never remember anything negative. There are just sweet snapshots of the personality living life to the fullest. (in the case of all but holding the baby with beautiful wee face) I still hear the laughter of our 20 year old (most contagious), her music (talented), while seeing her jumping to hit the door jam during her cheerleading years. So is it the memories with love which keeps them alive and the best kind of keeping them with us?

The pyramids, though beautiful structures, make me think "slavery."

I, too, still like, in the way of celebrations, the graduation concept. Good thing. ;) That is the way of progression/ascention?

The..."digging hole in garden and chucking in the body" reminds me of the unknown mortal in hole on our ranch discovered by the dog after the cows fell in the hole exposing the wood casket. After an investigation it was determined it could only be the old granny of some renters of long ago. Everyone, still living, had always been "concerned" (but not enough to pursue) about what happened to her. Do you think the renters held a funeral? ;)

Faith sister,

Carolyn







Yes, losing a child is the worst - I think people with wisdom will agree. The info in the UB should be a real comfort - you know she's MORE than okay and probably even more worried about you still being here on Urantia... ;)

I'm not sure it was all about the money that funeral homes make when we look back on the pyramids in Egypt....? Do you...? True, "misery loves company", but I still like the idea of a "graduation" celebration and proper science applied to burying a dead body....it sure beats digging a big hole in the garden and chucking in the body while no one is around - although any kind of "celebration" will certainly cost more money than that. :P

That's the problem with "traditional" interpretations of Jesus's "death", we don't even realize that he's still alive. As is your daugther and your dear life-long friend and all the others we might be missing. Agreed - only when you still feel the "love" do you know that truth...


"Knowledge is possessed only by sharing; it is safeguarded by wisdom and socialized by love."

#17 nameless until fused

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Posted 02 September 2008 - 04:56 PM

So is it the memories with love which keeps them alive and the best kind of keeping them with us?

YES, yes and yes! ;)

The pyramids, though beautiful structures, make me think "slavery."

It's not "slavery" anymore - the politically correct term is "volunteers" ;)

The..."digging hole in garden and chucking in the body" reminds me of the unknown mortal in hole on our ranch discovered by the dog after the cows fell in the hole exposing the wood casket. After an investigation it was determined it could only be the old granny of some renters of long ago. Everyone, still living, had always been "concerned" (but not enough to pursue) about what happened to her. Do you think the renters held a funeral? ;)

I love these tidbits from the wild wild west - and it still certainly is wild in the west! Guess that's why they were "renters" - they did not know how to utilize animals like the ranch owner did. Coyotes and vultures depend on the occasional gourmet granny food.... :P



#18 Carolyn

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Posted 03 September 2008 - 01:21 PM

'nuf,

;) ;) ;) Can't stop laughing, which brings up the following question:

Is humor in a funeral ceremony comforting?

My experience with laughter over a fun personality trait of the deceased, or some funny thing the deceased said or did, has always given me a comic relief to what could have been a somber/sad ceremony. Once went to a funeral at a happy church where everyone present was encouraged to participate in what became a "roast." The humor got better and better. I thought we were at the "best comedy club" ever without vular or unkind references. I laughed for days following as I remembered the event; grief ended and life went on with a smile.

p. 548-49 "Even mortal humor becomes most hearty when it depicts episodes affecting those just beneath one's present developmental state, or when it portrays one's superiors falling victim to the experiences which are commonly associated with supposed inferiors. You of Urantia have allowed much that is at once vulgar and unkind to become confused with your humor, but on the whole, you are to be congratulated on a comparatively keen sense of humor. Some of your races have a rich vein of it and are greatly helped in their earthly careers thereby. Apparently you received much in the way of humor from your Adamic inheritance, much more than was secured of either music or art."

In this quote does "earthly career" refer to death and funerals? ...and back to the question of comfort with humor.


Faith sister,

Carolyn
"Knowledge is possessed only by sharing; it is safeguarded by wisdom and socialized by love."

#19 nameless until fused

nameless until fused

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Posted 03 September 2008 - 02:23 PM

[quote name='Carolyn' date='Sep 3 2008, 11:21 AM' post='5120']

Is humor in a funeral ceremony comforting?

Depends on the personality of the person who "graduated"....the foreign wife of my cousin who had a sudden heart attack at Age 58 is/was a prosletizing atheist and she was very focused on having things her way with an efficient and ceremony-less "disposal of the body". But my decesead cousin, a radiologist, had the most wonderful infectious giggle and that classic "sick" sense of humour (not vulgar or unkind - but out there when it comes to death) that most people in the medical arts develop as a safety valve over time. So we let the wife do whatever she wanted to do, and we had our own "remembrance" to which she was invited. There was no way any of us, who knew him from childhood, could let the opportunity pass to remember the "classic" moments of humour...my story is about how the usual gang of 6 teenage boys (deceased was oldest of the group) decided to experiment with gas production in the human body and how I was called upon to make the decision about whether we had to take him to the hospital for treatment or not....Hollywood never produces movies that are as great as real life...it's a shame that the foreign wife did not show up to the "roast" - but she was true to her personality - no wavering from her idealogy and I don't think she was all that interested in how her husband dealt with growing up in USA...I hope people get to keep their great Urantia laugh when they're reassembled on the MORONtia worlds....


p. 548-49 "Even mortal humor becomes most hearty when it depicts episodes affecting those just beneath one's present developmental state, or when it portrays one's superiors falling victim to the experiences which are commonly associated with supposed inferiors. You of Urantia have allowed much that is at once vulgar and unkind to become confused with your humor, but on the whole, you are to be congratulated on a comparatively keen sense of humor. Some of your races have a rich vein of it and are greatly helped in their earthly careers thereby. Apparently you received much in the way of humor from your Adamic inheritance, much more than was secured of either music or art."

In this quote does "earthly career" refer to death and funerals? ...and back to the question of comfort with humor.

Death is the final act of our play, no? So I would place it in the "earthly career" portion of our ascension career ;) When you think about the mind-blowing distances across space that we will have to cross as we head towards Paradise, its fun to know that we are put "to sleep" while making the journey (....."are we there yet?!...") - for which I am grateful, but at the same time, I always sit in the window seat because I like to see the journey - so I guess I can view the scenery I missed while "at sleep" on some kind of recording or other....anyway, nice to know there's so much tyranny-free adventure ahead of us...

#20 Carolyn

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Posted 04 September 2008 - 12:58 PM

Good story about humor in the funeral being a comfort, 'nuf, ;)

I hope others will share their experiences. We could use more laughter.

[quote name='nameless until fused' date='Sep 3 2008, 12:23 PM' post='5122']
[quote name='Carolyn' date='Sep 3 2008, 11:21 AM' post='5120']

Is humor in a funeral ceremony comforting?

[color="#800080"]Depends on the personality of the person who "graduated]

So we may have come back to idea that the personality we honor should make known how they would like to celebrate. Then we follow through. In the event they do not leave instructions, we are obliged to remember who they were to us and stay true to a celebration of memory.

I am amazed at the funerals that are planned without any concern for the personality that departed. The promotion of church doctrine at a funeral is particularily offensive. Ritual and tradition overrides the individual personality. We end up leaving the event with no idea who we buried.

Reminds of my husband's experience. He was asked to speak at a friend's funeral. He arrived at the event and upon reading the name and the time thought he was late. He walked in just in time to get to the front of the room and give the eulogy. As he left he met the family of his friend who was just arriving at another room. Wrong funeral; same name. He gathered his wits and simply went into the other funeral and gave the same eulogy.;)

Faith sister,

Carolyn
"Knowledge is possessed only by sharing; it is safeguarded by wisdom and socialized by love."




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